Jan 25, 2009

Line By Line: Presidental Address (Jan 24, 2009)

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>http://www.whitehouse.gov/president-obama-delivers-your-weekly-address/

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Title: 01/24/09: President Obama's Weekly Address
Author: President Barack Obama
News Source: whitehouse on YouTube
Release Date: Saturday, January 24, 2009 EST
Area: Washington, DC

Begin Article:

We begin this year and this Administration in the midst of an unprecedented crisis that calls for unprecedented action. Just this week, we saw more people file for unemployment than at any time in the last twenty-six years, and experts agree that if nothing is done, the unemployment rate could reach double digits.

And since Obama doesn't want to be blamed for this, as it is now under his watch, we need to do something right now.

Our economy could fall $1 trillion short of its full capacity, which translates into more than $12,000 in lost income for a family of four. And we could lose a generation of potential, as more young Americans are forced to forgo college dreams or the chance to train for the jobs of the future.

Hm.... I wonder where he gets his figures from. Seriously, what is the economy's "full capacity"?

In short, if we do not act boldly and swiftly, a bad situation could become dramatically worse.

And, in short, if Obama acts quickly, a bad situation will become dramatically worse, as I'm sure he will outline right now:

That is why I have proposed an American Recovery and Reinvestment Plan to immediately jumpstart job creation as well as long-term economic growth. I am pleased to say that both parties in Congress are already hard at work on this plan, and I hope to sign it into law in less than a month.

Hm... how does the government create jobs again? How do we jumpstart job creation, Obama?

It’s a plan that will save or create three to four million jobs over the next few years, and one that recognizes both the paradox and the promise of this moment - the fact that there are millions of Americans trying to find work even as, all around the country, there’s so much work to be done.

Oh, I thought the paradox of the moment was that Obama was planning on creating jobs out of thin air. Obama, please, you still haven't told us HOW you plan on creating/saving jobs. Could you please answer that?

That’s why this is not just a short-term program to boost employment. It’s one that will invest in our most important priorities like energy and education; health care and a new infrastructure that are necessary to keep us strong and competitive in the 21st century.

Okay okay okay...... HOW? Obama? Could you please... answer....?

Today I’d like to talk specifically about the progress we expect to make in each of these areas.

The progress that we espect to make but don't know how we expect to make it.

To accelerate the creation of a clean energy economy, we will double our capacity to generate alternative sources of energy like wind, solar, and biofuels over the next three years.

Oh boy. Here comes the new GREEN economy. Obama, I hate to break it to you, but that economy is going to fail. A green economy is a forced economy, and a forced economy is a failed economy because it cannot do what it wants to do when it wants to do it.

And, actually, does this mean that these are the new jobs?!

We’ll begin to build a new electricity grid that lay down more than 3,000 miles of transmission lines to convey this new energy from coast to coast. We’ll save taxpayers $2 billion a year by making 75% of federal buildings more energy efficient, and save the average working family $350 on their energy bills by weatherizing 2.5 million homes.

Woah woah woah, there. WE will weatherize 2.5 million homes. I thought for a moment that Obama said that we, as in the government, is going to weatherize 2.5 million homes. Where's those Right to Privacy people now?

To lower health care cost, cut medical errors, and improve care, we’ll computerize the nation’s health record in five years, saving billions of dollars in health care costs and countless lives.

Well, besides cost of paper and maybe transfer of records costs, how exactly does that cut billions in healthcare? Especially since computer glitches and hard drive failures are, well, bad for data. And actually, aside that, I thought that medical records were already being digitized, by the private sector (ie, not by the government).

And we’ll protect health insurance for more than 8 million Americans who are in danger of losing their coverage during this economic downturn.

Subsidized heatlhcare for everyone!

To ensure our children can compete and succeed in this new economy, we’ll renovate and modernize 10,000 schools, building state-of-the-art classrooms, libraries, and labs to improve learning for over five million students.

Um... no. Obama, that will improve the learning experiance not the actual learning. In order to imporve the actual learning, teachers are going to have to be better trained to a) teach and b) deal with trouble makers. It might also help if the Teachers' Union vanishes as well, because if they do, then that means that schools can fire bade teachers and raise the paygrade of good teachers. That is what will help education.

We’ll invest more in Pell Grants to make college affordable for seven million more students, provide a $2,500 college tax credit to four million students, and triple the number of fellowships in science to help spur the next generation of innovation.

And most likely, these increases in money will go to the poor kids who 90% of the time will drop out of school for bad grades anyway. Maybe instead of subsidies, we should find a way to decrease tuition. Not that the government can do that...

Finally, we will rebuild and retrofit America to meet the demands of the 21st century. That means repairing and modernizing thousands of miles of America’s roadways and providing new mass transit options for millions of Americans.

Um... Obama.... the roads belong to the states, not you.

It means protecting America by securing 90 major ports and creating a better communications network for local law enforcement and public safety officials in the event of an emergency. And it means expanding broadband access to millions of Americans, so business can compete on a level-playing field, wherever they’re located.

Obama's gon'na get me some In'trenet! MR. PRESIDENT YOU DO NOT CONTROL THAT! And by God if he takes it over!! Socialism Alert!! Socialism Alert!! Obama is going to take over dishing out Broadband! Prepare for a telecom/internet company government takeover!!

I know that some are skeptical about the size and scale of this recovery plan.

Oh, good. At least he's not stupid enough to think that all of us are socilists like him.

I understand that skepticism, which is why this recovery plan must and will include unprecedented measures that will allow the American people to hold my Administration accountable for these results.

Good. I like that. Unfortunatly, no one in the media is gonna give a crap to report these measurements, so it will all be for naught anyhow. Though I'm still not going to hold my breath for when these "measures" will appear.

We won’t just throw money at our problems - we’ll invest in what works.

Because if we were simply throwing money at the problem, then people might compare us to FDR, who simply through stuff at the wall to "see what sticks" (oh yes, FDR said that).

Instead of politicians doling out money behind a veil of secrecy, decisions about where we invest will be made public, and informed by independent experts whenever possible. We’ll launch an unprecedented effort to root out waste, inefficiency, and unnecessary spending in our government, and every American will be able to see how and where we spend taxpayer dollars by going to a new website called recovery.gov.

I can't wait to see Obama cut Government Jobs while saying that he's creating jobs. In fact, I think I'm going to have to wait - until Hell freezes over and the second thrid coming happens.

No one policy or program will solve the challenges we face right now, nor will this crisis recede in a short period of time.

This crisis may not go away for... uh... ten years! I'm going to have to work on this for ten years, ladies and gentlemen. Reelect me, 2016!

But if we act now and act boldly; if we start rewarding hard work and responsibility once more; if we act as citizens and not partisans and begin again the work of remaking America, then I have faith that we will emerge from this trying time even stronger and more prosperous than we were before.

Did you see it?! Did you see it?!?! "if we start rewarding hard work and responsibility once more"... Obama just admitted that we aren't rewarding hard work anymore. He just admitted that responsibility and hard work are NOT rewarded anymore. He just admitted that we are a socialist state because we reward everyone equally no matter how hard they try! Oh yes, people. We're there already, and Obama himself just confirmed it.

Thanks for listening.

No, thank you for the wonderful affirmation of socialism...

Thank you for choosing Line-By-Line! Good Bye!
C:\>

End Transcript.

Day 82 - Your Weekly Presidental Address

Status: YouTubing. So apparently, after our honorable president got elected on November 4th, he had the gall to begin a "weekly address" to the nation - via YouTube [ChangeDotGov]. He's decided to follow tradition of the president's "Weekly Address", except Obama will do it on YouTube. Not that I'm particularly mad at him because of it, it's just that I missed out on quality stuff I could have ripped from the addresses.

However, since Obama is now in office, he has changed his channel on YouTube. Now he is broadcasting from the Official Channel of the White House, which would seem like an act of real Hubris had he done this before his Inauguration, but given that he started the whitehouse channel after his Inauguration, it's not nearly as hubris-y. As per "White House copyright policy" (which may or may not be his policy), all these videos are in the public domain and, strangely for YouTube, can be downloaded with a link under the video. You can also watch these things "in HD", which is different from "watch in high quality", because "HD" expands the video window to fill the entire width of the page so you can see every blemish and lie in our president's face (giving you a "Damn! I could touch it!" sensation). I think I'll be having a Line-By-Line of his weekly addresses shortly, especially if he decides to say anything other than "these things need to be changed".

The other thing that I want to address right now is the Presidential BlackBerry. Oh yes, Obama got to keep the BlackBerry, which apparently he faught tooth and nail to keep [Associated Press]. According to AP, this is his habit that he just couldn't drop (like his smoking habit, but that got pretty much dropped). Obama, I must say that this will probably be one of the worst descisions you have made, yet. I know that sentence was all over the place with tenses, but hear me out:
Obama's off at Camp David for some reason. Someone, maybe a terrorist who decided to infiltrate BlackBerry corp, decides to hack into his phone and triangulate his location (those things have GPS's too you know). The threat that was heading for Washington now reroutes to Camp David.
Mr. President, please, for your own safety, get rid of it. I know you can't live without it, but surely the CIA or someone there can come up with a special security device that applies all the Presidential Records Act crap and is not as vulnerable because it isn't a commercial device that anyone can buy to test-hack into before hacking yours. Mr. President, I hate you, but for the love of the country and for your own personal safety, replace the phone.

End Log.

PS, I went through and changed all the blog posts so that I don't have to limit my HTML layout creativity by Blogger's "Convert Line Breaks" setting. So everything should remain the same, but if suddenly all you people who RSS this blog have all of their posts set suddenly to "Unread", that's why. Now I just have to remember to put the double <br>'s into my posts. :)

Jan 21, 2009

Day 78 - We Try Not to Mix Up Our Oaths

Status: Creeped out. Firstly, a very interesting oath of office that Obama made. I didn't get the chance to see it live, but when Fox News replayed it later, I saw how much Obama botched the thing. Fox News jokingly questioned whether that oath actually counted, saying that it might go to the Supreme Court as to whether he is actually our president. I analyzed it to see if he actually said it correctly, and he did, so he is president, though I'm sure, just like all recent presidents before him, that he won't "preserve, protect, and defend" the constitution.

What I am creeped out about though it the video that appeared after the inauguration:
MySpace Celebrity and Katalyst present The Presidential Pledge
This creeps me out. Excuse me if I don't want to "Pledge to be a servent to our President". I don't want to serve our president! If there's any serving that I need to do, it will be to our country!! I DO NOT serve a man; I serve a nation! And excuse me if I don't want to pledge to do all sorts of liberal crap, like using less plastic, be more green, to flush only after a deuce (eww...), to buy a hybrid, to be of service to Obama... GAH! And I wonder if they realize that in order to "end 21st century slavery" we are going to have to go against the radical Muslims who run the salve trade... (Addendum: Comments aren't allowed on the video on MySpace, so post them here!).

Two more videos today: The first is of Senator (now Vice President) Biden's interview on Opera a day or two before the inauguration. [ABC News Article] His wife was intturupting and accidently let slip that Biden had a choice between VP and Secretery or State. This is indeed interesting, given that the Secretary of State is now Clintion's job. Surely this gaffe doesn't mean that Hillary wasn't first choice...

Finally: this video is perfect to show those Gun-Control-Loving friends of yours. Criminals cirtantly love Gun Control almost as much as they do: http://www.wikio.com/video/695405

End Log.

Jan 13, 2009

Day 70 - Waistbands, Gaza, Inhalers, Oh My!

Status: Swamped with stuff. Let's get down to it right away then!

First story of the day: In the morning radio program I listen to (Quinn and Rose), I heard them talk about how one of their listeners hates their new Rescue Inhaler. For those of you who don't know, recently Rescue Inhalers for Asthma Patients had to be replaced because they used CFC's. Now everyone who has their heads screwed on crooked will tell you that CFC's are bad for the Ozone layer (despite the fact that they are heavier than air and therefore cannot reach the ozone layer, but I digress). So now new HFA Inhalers are being prescribed to Asthma victims (I use that term intentionally). The result, "sucky" Inhalers, and not just in how they perform. Users report how they have to use the HFA Inhalers 10 or more times to even get some relief, as compared to the old Inhalers, which most people used once, maybe twice, and felt instant relief. Just take a look at Consumer Reports. The reason for the switch was for the environment, and people are being sent to the ER over it. These Victims need to organize and serve a class action lawsuit... against Al Gore and the EPA. Use the liberal's methods against them!

Second item: This news story, from the Pitt News, the local college newspaper. The article starts out by stating that "Students and professors are decidedly split when it comes to recent events in Gaza". Fine, as the country seems split over it for some unnamed reason. However, what irks me about this article is how they print bullshit:
In [Magid] Shihade's [visiting professor] opinion, the reality is something quite different. Citing unnamed “news and intelligence reports within the country of Israel itself,” he said that he believes Israel broke the cease-fire agreement, instead of the other way around.
Okay, why would you print this?!?! WHY?! He is admittedly citing unnamed sources!!! They would say: Oh it's giving both sides of the story. The other side doesn't count if they can't even freaking name their sources!! You have no idea how much work I go through on this blog to cite something for evidence on everything I give you! A few weeks back, I heard a really good argument on Glenn Beck, but I couldn't find anything to back it up. I had a moral struggle on whether or not to put it in (I did, with proper apology), but here we have some guy simply blurting out, "Oh they started it" without so much as a news article!! GAH!!!

Third thing: Despite Glenn not giving a source earlier, I did find this story he was talking about: Waistline police may come with universal health care. I encourage you to read the article, but to sum it up: with universal health care comes government controlling costs, which comes with a "waistline police" that determines what you can eat and what you can do. We've already got it going; Cities have banned trans fat, and the government has required healthier choices. And with Universal Health Care, it will only get worse...

Finally, a story that fall under the "that can't be possible" label: "An eccentric loner hoarded so much rubbish he had to BURROW through it to get around his home — then got lost in the maze of tunnels and died of thirst." [The UK Sun] Yes, for those of you who know someone who keeps way too much crap in their house, there is someone worse. "That Can't Be Possible!" Just read the story.

End Log.

Jan 5, 2009

Line By Line: New Program Helps Improve Behavior

Okay, while I was joking before about having a new Line-By-Line program, I actually DO now have a program that outputs this Line-By-Line transcript! (I made it myself, because I'm that cool and it's much easier to do it in there than editing the actual HTML to make it). Granted, it's not a command line program, it is much better this way. It may be available for public consumption at a later date. For now:

Welcome to Line-By-Line! WARNING: If you can see this line, than the following transcript may not be formatted properly: you will not be able to tell the article from the commentary. Please go to the original post to see the proper Line-By-Line output transcript.
Please enter the URL of the news article you will be berating today.
>http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/news/stories.nsf/education/story/24CAA54BE56254C986257523000F7CFA?OpenDocument

Now Loading Article...
Title: Program helps St. Louis area schools use rules to improve behavior
Author: Valerie Schremp Hahn
News Source: St. Louis Post-Dispatch
Release Date: Thursday, December 18, 2008MST
Area: St. Louis

Begin Article:

If you were a student at Halls Ferry Elementary School in Florissant, you'd know that when soft music comes on in the cafeteria, it's time to finish eating. If your teacher asked you to "slant," you'd know the acronym means to sit up straight and get ready to listen.

Cool, soft music is always much nicer than the stupid "SHUT UP AND EAT!!!" my elementry and middle schools tried. And not sure how "sit up stright and get ready to listen" turned into "SLANT", more like "SUSaGRtL" depending on how many pronouns you want to keep.

And if you were new here, and needed a primer on all the school's rules and procedures — and there are lots of them — you'd be invited to join the Newcomer's Club.

Cool, a nice way to welcome the new kids instead of the way that kids like to sometimes...

"I just think that's so good for kids, to come into an environment and know what is expected of them," said Lisa Hazel, principal of Halls Ferry, in the Ferguson-Florissant School District.

Well, it'd be nice to know what's expected instead of just guessing... That's usually what RULES are for...

All schools have rules; just try keeping 500 children in line without them.

Um... yes, thank you Captin Obvious. Your point?

But schools like Halls Ferry have rules nailed down to a science. Administrators say they are using rules not just to keep order, but also to set kids up to succeed.

............yeah....? Are you saying that this is unusual? Why is this news? Hopefully the rules wouldn't be set up for kids to FAIL?!

The schools practice PBS, or Positive Behavior Support. It's sometimes called PBIS, or Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports.

You mean something like punishments?! Oh God that would be unique and different! You acctually punish kids for doing something WRONG!!

Ask any of these schools to show you their rules and regulations binder, and you'll see procedures and lesson plans for everything.

Again, this is NEWS to you people?! It's NEWS if someone actually plans how to run the school?!?!

Everything. How to line up in the cafeteria. How to use "nice hands and feet" on the bus. How to be kind to classmates.

Let's rephrase this: "Everything. How to be orderly and not push and shove and cut in line. How to not punch and kick and shove and beat each other up on the bus. How to be kind to classmates." This isn't rocket science people: kids have rules, kids behave. When they don't behave, when you punish them, and they learn not to do that. NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!!!.

But the program isn't about creating endless lists of rules and cracking down on violators. Instead, the focus is on setting expectations and catching students being good. In other words, schools are offering more carrots and fewer sticks.

Um... I don't know if you want to compare rewards to carrots. I know you greeniewheenies out there think that carrots are a nice snack for kids, but kids hate carrots. Candy would be a better comparison, I think.

And this also isn't rocket science. You praise a kid for good behavior, they continue the good behavior. I learned this in Intro to Psychology. INTRO to Psychology. Not deep stuff here.

Hazel said the approach makes her job easier — about half as many students were sent to her office last school year as the year before.

Imagine that...

Positive Behavior Support is in schools in all 50 states. Halls Ferry was one of the first local schools to start it 10 years ago.

I still can't beleive they have to call this something special... And while Hall Ferry started it ten years ago, it was being used over two hundred years ago by our ancestors. Paddling!

Hazelwood, University City, Clayton, Pattonville, Kirkwood, and Webster Groves are among area districts that have signed on more of their schools in the past few years.

The school mentioned above are signing on to what hundreds of years of human histroy have taught us already. The libs tried wiping it out, apparently, and they obviously failed.

The approach is not rigid; it evolves with the needs of a school. But there is consistency within individual schools.

Yeah, PUNISHMENT!

"Everyone in the school uses the same words," says Thurma DeLoach, director of Kirkwood's special programs. "It's not like when I was in school, where in one classroom these were the expectations; in another classroom, you can get away with murder."

In inner city classrooms, you can still get away with actual murder, but I digress...

Teachers set up their own classroom rules and procedures, but they reflect the school's general philosophy and are similar to those in other classrooms in the same grade level.

Just like what normal schools, like private schools, and catholic schools, and other schools like that have been doing for decades of decades now. Catholic Schools especially - they teach GOD! "Oh no! We can't do that! Blasphemy!"

The program is based on the theory that about three-fourths of students in the school don't have behavior issues. About a fourth of students might need some help, which could mean they get a mentor or an invitation to attend a school "social skills club." A small percentage of students have chronic issues and need more help; they're likely to be put on behavior plans.

Wow, A program that targets those who need it. Seriously, how many times can I say the same thing?!

When schools decide to adopt the program, they might start small with a problem that their school can work on, like cafeteria behavior. Teachers and staff members — from the recess aides to the janitors — agree on a way to address each issue.

At Eureka Elementary in the Rockwood district, cafeteria workers give tickets to students for every positive behavior they observe. Grade levels keep track of how many tickets they get and compete to win the week's "Golden Tray Award" — a spray-painted plastic cafeteria tray.

Again with the positive reinforcement! This stuff is NOT NEWS!!!

"It's unbelievable," Eureka Principal Brian Gentz said. "It has changed an entire lunch."

Yeah, lady, when there's something cool to work for, kids will do it! I mean, look at those funky TV shows that slime kids in order to win trips to the tropics!

With the rules comes a common theme to make following them fun.

BLASHPEMY!!!

At Ritenour Middle School, Huskies get "paws for applause" for good behavior. At Ackerman School in Florissant, part of the Special School District, students' names are placed on a bee, which is taped next to a central beehive in a hallway. Halls Ferry students see handprints as a common theme, and they agree to follow the "high fives." There are six of them: Be safe, kind, cooperative, respectful, peaceful and responsible.

"When we do the high fives, you can earn good listening tickets and you can earn a lot of things, like lunch with a teacher," Halls Ferry second-grader Reggie Ross said.

Ew... who want's lunch with a teacher?

The approach translates to good feelings all around, said Carol Fouse, principal of Hazelwood East Middle School in the Spanish Lake area. She recalled the story of a girl who visited her office at the end of last school year and asked, "Did you make up this school?"

"Yes, as far as coming up with the rules and everything," Fouse responded.

"Well, you did a good job," the girl said. "You know what? I haven't needed to fight this year. I got into fights all the time at elementary school, but I feel safe at this school."

"That," said Fouse, "was very cool."

Kids don't like to see fights all the time, really. It's just when the kids have no RULES that they fight to do something.

But again, I cannot see how this is news! This is NOT NEW people! We've been doing this for hundreds of years! The Socialist Liberals made it new. We really need to stop them, really...

Thank you for choosing Line-By-Line! Good Bye!
C:\>

End Transcript.

Jan 3, 2009

Tuttle Cam - Tuttle's Economic Stimulus package

This is contributor James Tuttle. Once again, spread this video like Obama spreads the wealth.

Go to the blog or Go to the video

Louisiana governor Bobby Jindal rocks.  Here's why.  Other states are asking for a bailout.  The voters in those states need to learn how to vote.

Day 60 - Obama will overwhelm... the sewers

Status: Green. At the super market today, in the cereal aisle, I was telling my little brother about how Organic foods are just a scheme to make more money off of doing less. It just so happened that we happened upon these:



Oh yes, Organic Cereal! Here's the latest addition to the brainwashing! EnviroKidz Organic brand cereal! GLUTEN FREE!! (What the hell is gluten anyway? I've never heard of it before the envirowenies came on the scene and it seems stupid/pushy/very-much-like-carbon-credits-y. I haven't seen any "gluten" on the Nutrition Facts!) Also, 1% of sales is donated to wildlife! (Why just 1%? Why not more? And since when has "wildlife" needed money? Someone get me a picture of a Zebra paying off a Lion and then we'll talk about money going to "wildlife".) Good God... Why do you inflict us with this?!

Anyhow, on to real stuff: Washington DC is fretting terribly over Obama's Inauguration. The crowd coming to the event are predicted into the millions, a number that Washington has never seen before, basically because they've never seen a socialist messiah before. Supposedly there are expected food shortages, housing shortages, as well as slow internet and slow service at every public venue. [Washington Times] [AFP] Oh yes, and a ruling calls for all bars in the DC area to stay open extra late during the Inauguration - supposedly so that people can forget how much Obama has let them down... [DC Examiner] Time for the people to get a taste of the socialism...

Finally, to cheer everyone up immensely with a good chuckle, rock musicians are protesting the US government's use of their songs to torture detainees at Gitmo. Yes, you read correctly, quit re-reading the sentence. The US is using songs from Rage Against the Machine and AC/DC and, yes, Barney (see, you knew that was tourture) are being pumped full volume into the cells of the detainees. Apparently, it's having adverse effects on them as well, especially given that they're banging their heads off the wall, hoping to make it stop. Unfortunatly, not all of the bands take a liking to this, as they've joined forces to protest that the US stop it (together now: "woop-de-do"). Some bands do seem to like the fact that their music is torutuing people though - at least they've got their heads on straight and realize that they don't have to be offended, and that their actually helping us be safer. Now if only "Rage Against the Machine" could understand that, the nitwits... [The Raw Story]

End Log.